Happy fun hour!

I have had some really funny incidents staying in Europe's finest hostels and hotels. And when ever something strange happened I thought to myself "make sure you remember that - you may need to do stand up one day and that was gold". If you are ever thinking about staying in the odd hostel or two I hope my experiences will convince you to do it. They are a lot of fun and you will meet some of the nicest albeit quirkiest people this side of the world.

In chronological order of dates

Edinburgh - St. Hostel
I stayed in a twenty bed dorm in Edinburgh. Some of the beds were behind partions so it was hard to see who was and wasn't there. One day I thought I was alone and started singing to myself, three guys were asleep around the corner. But that was not as bad as one guy who didn't realise myself and another girl were reading on our beds. He got up to go to the bathroom... naked. Saw us let out an "Ep!" and ran back to his bed.

London - Enterprise hotel
One night I lay in bed dreaming of monkeys. "Ee e Ee e Ee e" Turns out it was the couple above having sex. Well fair enough they were staying in a hotel room. Check the time 6am! Who the hell is having sex at 6am. Then 9am. Then 10am.

Also, I wrote this in my blog but when I lugged my suitcase up many stairs through London town and I got to my room and there were a set of stairs inside the hotel room, I was so pissed off, I decided to fashion a sled out of a box and slide down them. I don't know how this could nullify the sheer magnitude of stairs I had to deal with but it did make me happy.

Paris - Love and Peace Hostel
Dude vomiting all over himself and the floor. I can laugh about it now I realise how absurd the situation was. It was a three person bunk bed in a room so small you had to climb into the bed so the others could walk past you. The two of us on top were pretending we couldn't hear anything because we were "sleeping so deeply". You know when you want to avoid awkward situations, so when they say "hey hope I didn't keep you up" you say "no, why what happened?" even though you were fully aware of the whole ordeal and plan to write about it in your blog. Well that's exactly what happened to me!

Madrid - The Cat's Hostel
An older gentlemen stayed with us in a 10 bedder and that guy could snore! We all sat up in our beds wondering aloud to each other how he wasn't waking himself up. He paused for a second and someone said "Is he dead?" to which the whole room cracked up laughing. The older gentlemen wakes up and moans "Be quiet". This one guy says "I know buddy they're very inconsiderate" but the older gentlemen doesn't hear him he is fast asleep.

Another night a guy brought a girl back to our room and lets just say if I didn't see "Where do I come from?" in year 6, I would be up to speed after their on the covers romp. I mean really what kind of self respecting person does the dirty dirty in a packed hostel room with their mates camera's flashing off every 10 seconds? I ask you?

Lisbon - The Poet's Hostel
I seem to have issues with snorers. I got moved to a room during my second week where a large guy had the record for the loudest snorer in the world. Look I'm sure he has a winning personality but sometime in his youth he shoved a penny up his nose and his subsequent attempts to snort out his bus change every night have remained fruitless. And I went to great lengths to deal with it. Ear plugs, pillows, going to sleep first and timing it so that I would be deep into my rem cycles. Nothing worked. I started to look like a torture victim after my third day. But the funniest part was when he wakes up one morning looks over at me and says "Geez dude you don't look so good - you need to get more sleep!"

On the last night there was this one guy who I had shared a room with for three nights suddenly broke into these long soliloquies in his sleep. It was so random and entertaining.

Well there you have it - fantastic reasons to stay in hostels.